Like attracts like -- and so on and so forth

March 4, 2025

It’s all about self love. Just in case you don’t make it to the end of the article you got the cliff notes. Out of everything I’ve ever learned to help me feel more at peace in my life and relationships and to actually be of service in some way in the world, it always seems to circle back to loving and forgiving myself and others.

While, “It’s all about love” sounds so cliche and trite, it is the most important work we can do to create a more peaceful, just and sustainable world. For a long time I resisted the notion that inner work can really change the world for good when there are so many pressing and dire needs like feeding malnourished children, I now believe it is the only thing that will. 

If a million people were in a state of peace meditating for peace would it be more powerful than a million people marching and shouting against war? If a million people cleaned the pollution from their minds and homes and relationships and prayed or meditated sincerely for the healthy restoration of mother earth would it be more impactful than a million people protesting against President Trump for gutting environmental protections? Can it be that every thought and action we put into the world that is against anything we don’t like is actually perpetuating it? 

I want to find out for myself. My ego continually pesters me to shout how wrong it is. All the things that are wrong, that is. I want to say it and commiserate with people who agree with me and judge those who don’t because they are wrong and it’s wrong and why is there so much wrong out there? We have entire communities and deep camaraderie based on what’s wrong and againstness. We are bringing more of whatever we think is “wrong” vibrationally into the universe by being anti-war, for example, instead of fully devoted to peace. 

There is great discipline involved in holding a center place, observing the world without judging, and going about the work that needs to be done from a place of love, not againstness. Letting go of againstness does not mean we agree with or like what is happening by the way, it just means we do the work to change things from a different energy and I believe we will see a different result. 

For example, I am against the radical cuts to USAID among other vital programs recently. I can spend my time decrying how wrong it is to fire so many people without cause which leaves vulnerable people more vulnerable to save money that is going to give rich people tax cuts, “People will die!! You are wrong! It is wrong!” I want to scream. And, people will die. And my screaming won’t matter. It will only add to the anger, rage and againstness when we desperately need the opposite of that. I can go about feeding children, caring for them, loving them without being against all this stuff. And I will do that.  

Culturally we are at war with our own essential nature which is love. And, when we are not in love we attract more of what is not love. When we are in love, we attract more love. It is a universal law that like attracts like. It is also true then that lack attracts lack. When I am experience lack inside of myself, I see and feel lack outside of myself. I project blame that someone is not being there for me when I am not even being there for myself. I don’t listen to myself and my own deepest yearnings and longings or inner knowing, yet I expect other people to listen to me. If I am too busy blaming and judging others I may forget to look inside where I am blaming and judging myself and to sit with that honestly and forgive it. 

Like attracts like. What is my inner landscape like? Am I at peace? Am I creating division, separation and blame inside myself? Am I content, satisfied and grateful? Am I feeling abundant? Am I in love with whatever this is that is me? Can I have her back and listen to her? If I desire others to listen to me and they’re not, I know I have to go in and listen to myself. It is a principle of spiritual psychology that outer experience is a reflection of inner reality. Damn. I’ve found out the hard way this is true.

It’s not meditating on the word p-e-a-c-e that is going to bring us to peace, it is going into a state of peace, an energy and vibration of peace within ourselves, and sincerely channeling that energy to the world. Once our collective consciousness resonates in the vibration of peace, we will experience peace. Until then, we will be at war because there is war inside of us. We will experience pollution and disregard for what’s precious outside of us because that is what’s inside of us. I want to see more love. I know I have to be more love. 

This post originally appeared in my monthly column in The Aspen Times.